AI Can Fix Your Feedback Problem

6 Ways Smart Managers Use AI to Help Their People Grow

Welcome to The Evolving Leader's Guide. Each week, I share one mindset, framework, or toolkit designed to help you become a more effective leader—so you can lead with confidence, inspire your team, and build a career you're proud of.

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This Week's Tool: The AI Feedback Amplifier

Your team needs thoughtful, timely feedback—but you're stuck rewriting the same draft three times, second-guessing your tone, and wondering why it never lands.

That's where AI comes in. Not to replace your judgment, but to help you get unstuck faster.

As a coach, I use AI daily to enhance my practice. It helps me recap complex sessions, brainstorm better questions before sessions, and even gives me feedback on my own coaching approach.

The same principles work for management feedback. AI helps you think through your approach, refine your message, and design better follow-up strategies without getting stuck in endless rewrites.

Most managers struggle with feedback because they focus on what they want to say—rather than how it will be received. AI bridges that gap by helping you see blind spots, reframe messages, and customize your approach.

The human connection remains yours. AI just helps you find better words and clearer approaches.

Here are five ways to use AI as your feedback co-pilot.

1. Diagnose the real issue, not just the symptom

When to use it: You see performance issues that keep repeating, and you suspect you're addressing the symptom rather than the real problem. You keep having the same conversations with no lasting improvement—like you're chasing one issue only to have another pop up.

What it helps you do:

• ✅ Spot patterns you might be missing

• ✅ Reframe issues with empathy instead of frustration

• ✅ Choose words that invite dialogue, not resistance

• ✅ Get to root causes instead of surface problems

Sample prompt: "I’m a XXX manager. Over the last month, one of my direct reports has been frequently interrupting colleagues during brainstorming sessions, submitting deliverables 2-3 days late, and when they do complete their work, I often have to redo most of it. Help me identify potential root causes and how to frame this as a development conversation, not a performance issue."

AI response: These behaviors suggest someone who might be feeling overwhelmed or insecure in their role. The interrupting could be anxiety-driven—trying to prove they understand before they actually do. The late submissions and quality issues might reflect perfectionism, difficulty prioritizing, or lack of clarity on expectations. Consider framing this as: 'I want to make sure you have the support you need to succeed in this role. What's been your biggest challenge lately, and how can I help you work through it?'"

2. Get your emotions out of the way

When to use it: You're frustrated with someone's performance and your first draft feedback sounds more like venting than providing feedback.

What it helps you do:

• ✅ Shift out of reaction mode before speaking

• ✅ Find multiple ways to say the same thing

• ✅ Sound like a coach instead of a micromanager

• ✅ Maintain trust while being direct

Sample prompt: 💬 "I'm frustrated because my team member has missed three important client calls this month, and I’m worried it is reflecting poorly on our team. Help me reframe this as a constructive development conversation. Give me three different approaches that focus on support and accountability rather than criticism."

AI response: Here are three approaches:
1) Collaborative: 'I've noticed you've missed a few client calls lately. Can we figure out what's getting in the way? I want to help you succeed with these.'
2) Direct but supportive: 'Missing client calls is becoming a pattern, and it's affecting how clients see our team. What's making these hard to prioritize?'
3) Solution-focused: 'Let's talk about the client calls. What would need to change to make these easier for you to handle?'
Pick whichever feels most like how you'd naturally say it."

3. Speak their language, not yours

When to use it: Your feedback isn't landing because you're using your communication style instead of matching theirs.

What It helps you do:

• ✅ Customize your approach for different personality types

• ✅ Anticipate their likely questions and reactions

• ✅ Choose the right examples and language

• ✅ Make your message more likely to land

Sample prompt: 💬 "I need to give feedback about collaboration skills to someone who is highly analytical, likes lots of examples over emotion, and tends to ask detailed follow-up questions about processes. What's the most effective way to have this conversation? What should I emphasize and avoid?"

AI response: "For your analytical team member:

1. Start with specific data ('I've observed three instances where collaboration could be improved'),

2. Explain the business impact ('This affects project timelines and team efficiency'),

3. And offer process-focused solutions ('Let's explore some collaboration frameworks that might work better').

For a relationship-focused person:

1. Begin with appreciation ('Your technical skills are strong'),

2. Frame it as team development ('I want to help you have even more impact through collaboration'),

3. And invite their input ('What's your sense of how the team works together best?')."

4. Rehearse the hard conversations

When to use it: You need to address something sensitive, high-stakes, or likely to trigger defensiveness—and you want to practice first.

What it helps you do:

• ✅ Practice different approaches without real-world consequences

• ✅ Anticipate pushback and prepare responses

• ✅ Build confidence before the actual conversation

• ✅ Polish both what you say and when you say it

Sample prompt: 💬 "You're playing Sarah, a top performer who's been with the company for three years. She delivers excellent work but has been dismissive toward newer team members in meetings. She tends to get defensive when receiving feedback about relationship issues. Help me practice this conversation."

AI response: "As Sarah in defensive mode: 'Look, I'm just trying to help the team move faster. These new people ask so many basic questions that could be Googled. I'm not being dismissive—I'm being efficient. We have deadlines.'

You respond (example): 'I can see you want the team to succeed. Help me understand what support the newer team members need to get up to speed faster.'

Sarah: 'Honestly? They need to do their homework before meetings. I shouldn't have to explain basic concepts every time.'

You (example): 'What if we created some resources so they come prepared?'

Sarah: 'I guess, but I don't have time to train everyone.' Notice how she keeps deflecting responsibility. Practice staying patient and solution-focused."

5. Analyze your feedback

When to use it: Your written feedback (emails, performance reviews, Slack messages) feels unclear or isn't getting the response you want.

What it helps you do:

• ✅ Turn vague feedback into specific actions

• ✅ Spot jargon and buzzwords that confuse people

• ✅ Find the right level of directness for written communication

• ✅ Make your written feedback actually useful

Sample prompt: 💬 "Here's some feedback I wrote: 'You need to be more strategic in your approach and show more leadership presence.' Why might this be unclear? Can you rewrite it to be more actionable and specific?"

Example AI response: "This feedback is too vague to be useful. 'More strategic' and 'leadership presence' don't tell them what to actually do. Here's a clearer version: 'I'd like to see you take more ownership in team meetings. Specifically, when you bring up problems, also suggest potential solutions. And when decisions need to be made on your projects, I want you to make the call rather than always asking for input. Let's try this approach in our next three team meetings and see how it goes.' This gives them concrete actions they can take."

5b (BONUS) Review your feedback conversations

When to use it: You want to get better at giving feedback and need to see how you actually come across in conversations—like how athletes review game film to improve their performance.

What it helps you do:

• ✅ Identify patterns in how you communicate

• ✅ Spot when you interrupt or miss cues

• ✅ Learn from both successful and difficult conversations

• ✅ Improve your real-time feedback skills

First get permission to record: "Hey, I've been trying to get better at these feedback conversations, and I'd love to record this one if you're okay with it. I listen back to see what I could do differently—kind of like how athletes watch game film. I'd keep it totally anonymous if I ever get feedback on it. But no worries if you'd rather not—we can just talk normally."

Then use this prompt: 💬 "Review this feedback conversation transcript and give me insights on: my communication style, areas where I could have been clearer, moments where the other person seemed to disengage, and specific suggestions for improvement."

AI response: "Analysis of your practice session: You spoke clearly but there are several areas to work on. You said 'obviously' three times, which sounds condescending even if you don't mean it that way. You interrupted yourself twice to add more points instead of letting ideas breathe. Most importantly, you jumped straight to solutions without really understanding their perspective first—this makes people feel unheard. Try asking 'Help me understand your view on this' and actually waiting for their full response before offering suggestions. Your tone was supportive, but the rushed delivery undermined that."

A few important considerations

Before you start using AI for feedback, there are some practical things to keep in mind. These aren't meant to scare you away—just to help you use these tools responsibly.

• Privacy first: Strip out names, company details, and confidential information before sharing anything with AI. When in doubt, create a fictional scenario that mirrors your real situation.

• Use secure tools: If you're handling any company information, only use organization-approved AI tools. Check with IT or legal if you're unsure.

• AI is your co-pilot, not your autopilot: Always review and edit AI suggestions before using them. The best feedback still sounds like you, not like a robot trying to be helpful.

The Human Touch Still Matters

AI makes your feedback more thoughtful, not more robotic.

You're still the one building trust. Still the one reading body language. Still the one showing that you care about their success.

AI just helps you find better words and clearer approaches.

Your team deserves feedback that helps them grow. AI can help you deliver it.

Coach Challenge

This week, choose one team member who needs feedback. Before the conversation:

☐ Use AI to analyze your observations and identify root causes
☐ Turn your emotional reaction into constructive language
☐ Customize your approach to match their communication style
☐ Practice the conversation with AI playing their role
☐ Afterward, get AI's feedback on how it went

Then reflect:

• What felt different about this process?

• How did AI change your preparation or confidence?

• What surprised you about their response?

Your team sees how you show up in hard moments. Show them it matters.